If We Never Flew
by Lemons For Crazy
Summary: When Piper's mom gets just plain sick of her, she gets shipped off to good ol' cousin Kendall's for her 18th birthday. Kendall's planning on taking her to an 18  club in LA where she just might meet some pretty interesting  and just plain pretty  people.
1. And So the Legacy Begins

**Piper's POV**

"What is it that you wanted me to say, sweetie? It's out of our hands."

"You know what, Mom? Just stop talking. Stop talking right now."

"Piper…."

"**No mom**. Better yet, why don't you do what Dad did and **just stop existing**."

"**Piper Charolette Smyth, you willshut your mouth and get in the car right this instant.** "

"**Wow, Mom. Now you put up a fight. Why was that so hard when you found out dad was trying to take me away?**"

"**That's different! Can't you see I only tried to do what was best for you?**"

I swallowed back my tears and whispered in a hoarse voice that didn't seem like it belonged to me.

"Then why didn't you want me anymore?"

I slammed my hand over my mouth, shocked at what I'd just said. Mom's face only changed for a fraction of a second, flickering back to the hard, expressionless grimace it had been before. I knew I had messed up, and walked to the car without a fight. Kendall was like my brother while my mom was 'on vacation'. Funny how my aunt thought I didn't know the difference between rehab and some sunny resort in Cancun. If it was a big, heaping slice of PMS-y Piper pie they wanted, that'd be exactly what they got.

I stalked out to the beat-up mini van, trying to magically turn myself into some kind of an optimist before I got a chance to slam the car door. Somehow, I managed to shut it noiselessly as I slid into the back, knowing I was gonna dig my hole even deeper if I sat next to Momzilla.

Now that I thought about it, Kendall and his parents had been **really** sweet to me. They took me in while mom was "on vacation", treated me like just another Schmidt sibling, made all the monsters get out from under my bed when I found out Dad was dead (this was after the divorce but pre-return of Mother of the Year up there in the front seat), and made me realize I had a reason to keep on living after my suicide scare in 5th grade. I was terrified to leave them when the woman I was forced to call mom came back on my 12th birthday. But alas, all good things must come to an end.

After that day, I hadn't seen any of them again. But now, just a few days before I turned 18, I was being dragged back to a place where I was actually happy. You might think of that as a contradiction, but oddly enough, it's not. I couldn't stand being happy again if I knew she was going to take it away as soon as it got good.

And _man_, were things about to get good.


	2. Freaking FREEZING Ants in My Pants

**Piper's POV**

"**Piper!**" my cousin screamed.

"Hey Kev. Is Kendall around?"

"Probably in his room playing Barbies or something. You can go up if you want."

"The wonders of brotherly love…" I shook my head. "Wait Ke….vin…. Okaaaay then."

I shook my head and went to grab my bags. I mean, **God forbid** my mom actually give a crap. I found my stuff on the ground where the car used to be. Love you, too, Mommy Dearest.

"**I hope you said your prayers, boy, 'cause you're dead!**"

At least I knew where Kendall was. How, you ask? Oh, I don't know. Why don't you ask the handful of ice cubes he ever-so-kindly donated to the inside of my pants?

I spun around and chased after him, trying to simultaneously shake the ice cubes out of my butt.

"**Imma hunt you down, boy!**"

After a good 5 minutes of my cousin running for his life and of me stumbling around in my flip flops, I was finally smart enough to kick off my shoes and tackle the idiot. Smart move.

"Okay, okay" Kendall laughed as I continued to slap the living daylights out of the back of his head as I sat on top of him.

"Geeeeeez Kendall! What exactly made that seem like a smart idea? I'm gonna get you soooooooo bad, dude."

"Is that really smart to say to the _wondrous, hunky, brilliant_ man who's taking you to Buzz for your birthday and letting you party with about 3,000 of your closest friends?"

"Who the fudge is Buzz?"

"Not _who_ but _where_. Oh god, Piper. I didn't know I had **that** much to teach you."

"Oh shush. I'm sure it's gonna be 'off the heezy, Kendizzle'." Insert slap upside the head by aforementioned man-child.

"Hey," I sighed with a smile and a hand on my previously slapped head, "It's good to be home."


	3. My Life as a Big Time Punching Bag

**Carlos's POV**

"So my cousin's coming tomorrow for her 18th birthday. I was thinking about taking her to Buzz and inviting a whole bunch of random people from the show and stuff. She'd probably think it was pretty beast to meet famous people…" Kendall trailed off, implying it was our turn to tell him what a good idea that was.

"Yeah, man. It'll probably blow her mind to see so many people from TV." It was apparent from James's tone that he was thinking the same thing as me and Logie; how hot can this girl possibly be if she's related to Kendall? I mean, don't get me wrong. The boy's like a brother to me, and he's a good-looking man… But to tell the truth, he probably wouldn't be a good looking _wo_man.

…_But then again, if she __**was**__ hot, none of us would object…_

"Oh man, Carlitos. I don't even want to know what you were thinking, but whatever it is, don't hurt yourself." Logan started trying to make whatever face I'd been making. **God** that's embarrassing.

…_Maybe if James invited one of __**his**__ cousins…._

"**Carlos!** Snap out of it dude. You look like you're about to have a stroke or something." James chuckled at me, apparently making the face Logan and I made.

"Yeah… S-sorry. Just thinking."

Without skipping a beat, "**Oh my god, he thinks!**" Thanks Kendall. Thanks a ton.

"Hey, man." James again. "Is she staying in the mansion with us or at your parents' house?"

"Yeah right, James. I'm _really_ gonna let the little girl who's basically my _sister_ sleep in the same zip code as you, **let alone** the same house. Keep dreaming dude." Pshh. Like we were gonna want to sleep with a longer haired Kendall. Poor girl.

Kendall got up to leave. As he stood up, he dropped his keys which apparently landed under the couch. He got down on the floor behind it to look for them. It's times like these that I wish I paid more attention…

"**God** I hope she's hot… What would Kendall think of one of us making out with his sister?" Damn my life. Damn Kendall sneaking up on me and smacking me in the head harder than he's ever hit me before.

…_I sure do hope this girl's hot. _


	4. Poker Face

**Piper's POV**

"Pleeeeeeease? I already forget where you said we're going," I whined.

"That's not my problem, is it? Trust me, it'll be more fun if it's a surprise. I put what you're wearing on your bed. Hurry up and get ready or we're gonna be late."

"Let me clear something up, Kendall. It may have been a while since you've seen me last, but I could dress myself since I was like _two_. Just thought I'd inform you of that."

"Oh yes, Piper. I was _so_ concerned about your ability to function like a normal person. If you don't even know where we're going, how are you supposed to know what to wear?"

"**Ughhhhhh.** Fine, but we wouldn't have this problem if you just **told me!**"

"Go get dressed" Kendall laughed, starting to hum the 'I'm a big kid now' commercial under his breath. Hardy har har, Kendall. I'm sure whatever you picked out for me is just as funny as your face.

**One hour later**

**Kendall's POV**

"**Hurry up, Piper!**" I screamed up the stairs, wishing my cousin wasn't such a… well, _girl_.

"Whatever happened to being fashionably late?" Piper walked down the stairs in her stilettos, obviously with the knowledge that she looked **hot**.

Aw god, I did NOT just think she was hot. **Bad popstar! Bad, bad, bad!**

"Stop drooling, Kendall" she smirked through red, full lips. "I don't think it's legal to marry your cousin in LA… but we could always go to Utah or something." **Damn.** Why did that sound almost tempting?

I grabbed Piper by the wrist and walked her to the car, chanting 'little sister, little sister' in my head as I opened the door and hopped in.

Glad I picked out her clothes… I tried to make her look hot without letting **too** much show. Who knows what she would've put on if I told her where we were going?

**About 25 miles and 30 minutes later**

I pulled into the parking lot, seeing Piper's face light up.

"**Ohmygod that's Jordan Sparks! Kendall, I love you!**"

"Calm down, little tyke. If you want to play with the big boys, you got to keep your poker face."

"Yeah, yeah, Kendall. Poker face. Got it."

Piper was out the door before the car stopped moving. Sweet poker face, lil sis.


	5. Eighteen Years Young

**Logan's POV**

"Hurry up, guys! Kendall's gonna be _so_ pissed if we're late."

"It's kind of hard to make myself look un-hot, so _excuuuuuuuse me_ if I'm not out the door in the next two seconds." Oh, god… What the hell is James doing?

I voiced that question as I screamed up the stairs at him and Carlos. Kendall had already gone to pick up his cousin almost two hours ago.

"Dude. This girl's Kendall's cousin. I can't just turn her down, or she might run crying to him. All I'm doing is solving the problem before it happens. She won't ask me out if I'm not my normally god-like self."

Carlos chimed in with a "What if she's not hideous?"

Listen… I'm normally not mean. I'm really not. Now that you know that…

I laughed.

It wasn't just some little, suppressed giggle; it was an out-right, scream-like _cackle_. I'm pretty sure I heard something like that out of James's mouth, but I drowned him out…

Looking back, I feel guilty. But at the time? Hilarious.

After another half hour or so, Carlos and James were downstairs. Here goes nothing…

**Piper's POV**

"Kendallllllll! Hurry up! Are you trying to boost some 3-legged turtle's ego or something?" I bounced on my stilettos, making a face when he started purposely walking slower with a stupid grin on his face.

I hummed a Big Time Rush song under my breath, not particularly thinking about it. I couldn't **wait** to see who Kendall invited. I mean, I already saw _freakin' Jordan Sparks_, and that was before I even got into the club.

Kendall finally dragged his slow butt to the end of the line where I was standing. We stood there for about 10 minutes, the line barely moving. Kendall turned to me with a smile. I could tell from the way he was standing that he was prepared to get a slap on the shoulder or a punch in the ribs after he finished talking.

"You know that everyone's here for you?"

"Yeah…" Uh-oh. I had no idea where he was going with this.

"Did you also know we didn't have to wait in line since you're the VIP?"

**Slap.** Kendall's a smart boy.

We walked up to the doors, guarded by a freakishly large bouncer. Insert various shivers from 1.) the wind and 2.) the fridge with a heartbeat looming over me.

Kendall talked to the human bulldozer, who gave me a once over before he gestured towards the door with a nod of approval. My cousin was **Soooooooo** gonna get it when we got home. Until then, I popped a smile on my face as I walked into Buzz with a quarter of America's next big thing on my arm.


	6. The Good, The Bad, and The Not So Ugly

**James's POV**

Judging by the fact that our phones all made assorted "Give me some damn attention!" noises at the same time, Kendall and the girl formerly known as 'the troll', 'Kendalletta', 'Penelope' (Yes, chick flicks are our guilty pleasure), or various forms of insulting nicknames for ugly girls were here. We made our way to the doors to see what the cat dragged in.

We saw Kendall and his date walking in but didn't see his **oh my damn why aren't I pretty tonight?**

No. No way. Someone needs to stop time so I can go punch that girl in the face.

Wow that came out wrong but you know what I mean. I'm panicking here. Panicking!

Just like Carlos and Logan standing next to me (and a few random guys standing near the door with now-pissy dates), I ran a hand through my hair, straightened my shirt, and checked my breath as Kendall and the hot chick tucked under his arm looked around for us. The girl who's name I can't remember because I never thought it would matter finally saw us, a spark of recognition in her HUGE green eyes as her jaw dropped. Heheh. I guess my celebrity status would be making up for my lack of hair gel tonight.

**Piper's POV**

Oh. My. **God.** I walked in the door with expectations, but **nothing** I imagined could've compared to what I saw in front of me; three of the hottest guys I'd ever seen who just so happened to go by the name of Big Time Rush. I've seen them on TV before. What? You thought I wouldn't watch their show when I started missing Kendall? What can I say? The way the lights (or lack thereof ) hit them, the smiles on their faces, the _trillions_ of things that could happen tonight…

Woah there, cowgirl. Take it easy. I looked in their eyes one at a time as I dragged Kendall behind me.

Logan. **Adorable**. His crooked smile was to be expected, but still kinda shocked me when I saw him break it out.

Carlos. Weird to see _all_ of his hair. Twice as hot without the helmet. Twice times **a thousand** times as hot as I thought he'd be.

Ja-… Damnnnnnnn.

Not once did I ever think of the guys of BTR as _that_ hot. Picturing them hanging out with the boy who's wrist I was probably crushing at the moment almost made them less hot. _Almost_.

Way to be, Kendall. My own personal birth control.

**Kendall's POV**

Oh god. James had his predator face on.

That's exactly what he was, too.

Normally you hear about some creepy middle aged guy driving up to a sweet, innocent, little girl playing in the front yard. He spits out the whole 'here's some candy now hop in' spiel and **bam!** Six o'clock news. Another one bites the dust.

I'm not calling James some pervy serial killer, but with a quick 'Hey I lost my puppy and it's somewhere in my bed wanna strip and look for it', the sweet, innocent, little girl might… not be so innocent.

Before I could make any introductions, James had his hand around her bangle-clad wrist and was dragging her to the dance floor. I wouldn't have been quite so worried if she wasn't so willing to follow him.


	7. Dancing With the Devil

**Piper's POV**

**Oh my lanta I was dancing with James Maslow.**

My brain was screaming, refusing to let me think. Heheh. The blonde a couple of yards away? Looked like she **and** her brain were screaming. **That's right, probably famous chick!** You can suck it, cuz James Maslow's _mine tonight_.

Well, that was a little overdramatic, but you get the picture. James and I danced for three songs without a word. About halfway through "TickTock", he just stopped and walked away with no explanation.

Oh. Guess that was just a quick little "Hey birthday girl, wanna dance so I can be your 10 minute fantasy before I crush your dreams?". Hey blonde girl? I think _I'm_ the sucker right now.

But then he stopped in the middle of the dance floor, turning around with a confused look plastered across his face. I had been looking down, but somehow I could feel his eyes on me. I snapped my head up, and sure enough, he was motioning for me to follow.

_Cuz the party don't start 'til I walk in._

**Carlos's POV**

Aw **man!** Turns out this girl was almost as hot as James claims _he_ is.

When she dragged Kendall towards us with her jaw nearly on the ground, I knew we'd have some kind of a fighting chance with her. She just stood there and blinked at all of us, un-purposely batting her lashes.

_Any kind of guy you want, girl_

It's not like we could call dibbs or anything while she and Kendall were standing there, so this whole night depended on which one of us she'd let adore her.

_That's the kind I'll be_

She looked into Logan's eyes. She seemed pretty impressed. **Damn.** I lost her before she could even look at me.

Apparently Logan didn't impress her _that_ much. She stared into my eyes next.

Was it just me or did she look at me longer? I licked my lips and started to smile, and **just** as she started to smile back…

James cleared his throat.

**Fuck you, James.**

I knew it was too late. There's no saving her now, when James has his predator face on.

Her gaze shot to his puppy dog eyes, barely even registering who he was, and to tell the truth, James must have forgotten who _she_ was, because he whisked her away to the dance floor without a second thought. Little did Kendall know, James didn't even know her name. Kendall's mouth snapped open as if in protest, but quickly shut. He stood there shaking his head. The three of us stared after them, probably thinking the same thing; _That's got to be a record._


	8. This Is EXACTLY Why We Keep Logan Around

**Logan's POV**

Carlos, Kendall, and I were dancing with girls and having a good time…

But during **all** of that good time, we made sure to keep our eyes on Piper and James.

But specifically, Piper.

Unlike her cousin, Carlos and I had ulterior motives. Yes, we were both trying to make sure nothing went too far, but to tell the truth? We were waiting for James to get tired of her so we could make our moves.

Great friends, right?

I looked up, expecting to see the two of them grinding again, but to my terror, they were gone.

Oh gee, James. Thanks for the week of hell you probably just bought us with Kendall. I had **no** idea where they were, but I could see the two out of three band mates I _wasn't_ mad at already leaving their girls in search of the third.

**Carlos's POV**

**Damn it, James.** This girl was Kendall's cousin, and you were about to get us **all** killed.

Kendall enlisted me and Log to go find Piper and James. A few songs later, I found them sitting on the couches in one of the corners…

Talking.

No. Way.

That couldn't be possible. James was totally up to something.

Piper was sitting next to him, her legs angled towards his. After another song's worth of what I now realize was creepy stalking, James slid her onto his lap.

_The better to hear you, my dearie._

This was so Little Red Riding Hood. Not even funny.

Every once and a while, James would sneak a kiss on her neck, or slide his hand dangerously closer to the edge of her (surprisingly short) skirt. Didn't Kendall say _he_ picked out her clothes for tonight?

It's not like they were doing anything wrong, but this was sure to end badly.

**Kendall's POV**

Carlos came and found me and Logan, showing me where they were. Oh god. James better keep his hands to himself or I'll make sure he doesn't HAVE hands to keep to himself anymore.

The three of us quietly monitored them, making sure nothing happened between them.

I felt kind of weird **stalking** my little sister. I mean, she's eighteen starting tonight. She should be able to take care of herself…

But it wasn't her I was worried about.

James's hands kept moving, his lips kept brushing her neck, his mouth kept whispering in her ear. She was sitting sideways on his lap now, making it a little harder to see, since I was looking at her barely covered back, which James had a hand on.

This needs to stop.

In a stroke of sheer brilliance, Logan came up to me.

"Is what I'm seeing as gross as what you are?"

"Just about."

"Then it's time to sing."

Not that I necessarily _got it_, I could tell Logan had cooked something up.

As long as we weren't planning on breaking into song in the middle of the dance floor, this was gonna be good.


	9. Good Luck and Good Riddance

**James's POV**

_Oh, Piper._

Piper Maslow.

Mrs. Piper Maslow.

Mr. and Mrs. James and Piper Maslow.

Wow. Aren't only _girls_ allowed to do that?

I really liked this girl. For the past hour or so, she'd been sitting on my lap, telling me about herself and asking me about _my_self.

True, I snuck kisses on her neck every once in a while and playing with the hem of her belt, erm, excuse me, _skirt_ was just to test my limits, but honestly, I actually like _talking_ to her. It was amazing how I wasn't Celebrity Extraordinaire to her. I was just James, that guy who her cousin's friends with.

Nothing could ruin this for me. Not unless…

"Who wants to hear Big Time Rush sing?" Screams from the entire club.

**Kendall is a dead man.**

**Logan's POV**

Poor James.

Poor Carlos.

I knew just telling DJ Mom Jeans [Author's Note: Danny Masterson, best known as Hyde from That 70s Show =)] that Big Time Rush would sing wasn't going to stop James from… well, being James, but I did know it would delay him, therefore saving me from Kendall's wrath when the night was over.

From our spot on stage, we could faintly see James lifting Piper off of him and grabbing her hand to lead her towards the stage. Dude. Bad choice. I could see Kendall fuming that he was still touching her in any way, shape, or form.

Good Luck, Charlie?

Psh. Good Luck, _James_.


	10. Making an 'Ass' Out of 'U' and 'Me'

**Piper's POV**

**Kendall is a dead man.**

I wasn't sure if I said that out loud or not, because the whole club was chanting "**Big Time Rush!**" Hmm… I wonder if the lead singer's sudden disappearance would cause any problems for them…

Snapping back to reality, I stumbled along in my stilettos as James pulled me through the crowd. He stopped suddenly, causing me to run into him. **Ow. **

I peered over his shoulder to see what the delay was.

Now I'm not sure, but it could've been the tall blonde who he was sucking face with. Just a thought.

I yanked my hand out of his. The girl pulled back a little, smirking at me.

"I'm so glad we're back together."

At least that's what I thought she said, considering I had already started backing away. Right before I stormed off, I saw that James turned around looking 1.) dazed and 2.)for me. Oh, I'm sorry! Did I interrupt you hoovering your girlfriend? Let me just leave so you two can make beautiful, overly-tall babies that you'll name after your conceited selves.

"Is James here? Come on up dude" DJ Mom Jeans said into the microphone. I'm sorry. James is kinda busy right now. Please take a message.

I ran off towards the parking lot with the knowledge that the guys on stage were watching me… and so was the asshole that I was using as a chair a few minutes before.

It took me until I got to Kendall's car to realize I was crying.

Stop it Piper. What did you expect? For Mr. Big Time Hollywood to propose or something? You're ridiculous.

My thoughts were interrupted by the sound of footsteps and heavy breathing. I didn't even bother trying to walk away, because I knew he'd outrun me, even if I took the time to take off my shoes.

"Piper…"

James grabbed my arm and tried to pull me in for a hug. Nuh-uh.

I yanked it back, sending me teetering on my heels. James grabbed me by the arm again, whipping me into the side of the car with an audible thud. **OW.** Killing me wasn't going to solve anything. All he had managed to do was knock the wind out of me, slamming the mirror into my stomach. He stood up against me, sandwiching me between his abs and the car. I tried fruitlessly to wiggle out from between them.

"Piper, just give me a chance. It wasn't what it looked like." Of course it wasn't. His conscience should really stop trying to cover it up with cliché, overused words and let James speak for himself.

Desperate to get away, I slid off the stilettos, kicked them to the side, and let my legs give out. There was just enough room for me to pop out between his legs and the bottom of the car. I tried to run, but part of my shirt got caught in the door as I slid down, tearing it in the middle of my stomach as I pulled away. Kendall's car must have **really** hated me, because somehow I managed to cut my face sliding down the side of it.

James grabbed me by the waist and yanked me up, pinning me against the car again. He turned my face to see how bad the damage was. At least karma was playing fair tonight.

I stepped on his foot as hard as I could, and lucky for me, his knee shot up against the driver's door and made a crash that even made **my** knee hurt. The sound scared the crap out of me so I squeaked, as he groaned in pain.

I slid down against the side of the car again, a fresh set of tears rolling down my cheeks. I felt terrible that I hurt him, I was overwhelmed, hurt, confused, and just plain sad.

**Kendall's POV**

I ran out of the club to go check on Piper, knowing that James probably got there before I could. Logan and Carlos had stayed behind to smooth things over.

As I got closer to my car, I could barely make out James's hand on Piper's face. I heard a bang, and suddenly, James's hand was off her face and she slid down the side of the car.

They hadn't been talking until now.

"Holy crap, Piper. Don't start crying again! All I wanted was for you to listen!"

I took off towards the car. Yeah, part of it was to check on Piper…

But most of it was to go beat the crap out of James.

"**Why the hell did you just hit my sister?**"


	11. The Least Smart Smarty I Know

**Logan's POV**

Oh. My. **God.**

I thought Kendall was smarter than that. The boy invited his best friend's ex.

Maybe he **was** being smart. If James was spending his whole night running away from Lacie, there'd be no time to go after Piper.

What a shame that none of us had counted on her laying low, then popping up at just about the worst possible time to do the worst possible thing. Lacie stopped him with a kiss, knowing full-well that his infatuation of the moment was still clinging to his hand.

When I saw it happen, all I felt was regret. If I'd never come up with the plan to sing, James and Piper would still be hidden in the corner. If James and Piper were still hidden in the corner, Lacie would've never found them. If Lacie would've never found them, Piper wouldn't have run out crying on her **freaking eighteenth birthday.**

But she did.

Unsurprisingly, Kendall told us to go through a song or two while he chased after his sister, which we did.

We were mid song when Piper came running up to the stage, barefoot with a shredded shirt to match the cuts on her face, saying that we needed to come get Kendall off of James. DJ Mom Jeans over heard us and put on some new concoction of sounds he had mixed. Everyone forgot all about us and started to dance.

We ran out the door, leaving Piper in the bathroom to wash off her face and cry.

**Kendall's POV**

I ran up and tackled James, not even looking at Piper, who was crying on the ground.

I started bashing that bastard's face in, and let me tell you, it felt _good_.

For a good five minutes, there it was near silent except for the smack of skin on skin and the occasional grunt from me and the soon-to-be road kill.

My mind barely registered the pair of footsteps pounding towards us until they magically turned into Carlos and Logan's hands yanking me off James.

I couldn't understand them not letting me finish him off. They saw what he did to Piper. They _must_ have hated him for it as much as I did.

Carlos kept a hold on me while Logan lunged to keep James still.

This battle was over…

But the war? That was just getting started.


	12. Almost As Screwed As a 2x4

**Piper's POV**

I was sitting on the counter in the bathroom, fresh out of tears. I didn't even bother to wash the mascara off my cheeks, the blood off my face, or the frown off my lips.

I heard knocking on the bathroom door. A smidge weird, to say the least.

Logan's voice came through the cracks.

"I know you're still in there. Is anyone else?"

I remained quiet, not caring if he thought I was ignoring him.

"I'll take that as a no."

He opened the door and walked over to me, with the good sense to keep his hands in his pockets.

"Wanna talk?"

I stayed silent, staring at the wall. Maybe if I made myself believe it, the world would just open up and swallow me whole.

Finally getting that no, in fact, I didn't want to talk, Logan hopped up and sat next to me, staring the same way I was. After a few minutes, he started humming "Barbie Girl" under his breath. I cracked a smile; that was so Logan.

"There we go." He grinned. He slowly reached for my hand, giving me more than enough time to stop him if I so chose… but I didn't.

I stared into his eyes, trying to figure out what he wanted. He stared right back, suppressing a smile. I couldn't help but laugh, and **bam!** Out came the signature lopsided grin.

I hopped off the counter and he followed my lead, my hand still in his. He told me that they got Kendall and James to keep their hands to themselves. He looked at me in the following silence, as if waiting for me to say something.

"He didn't hit me."

Logan nodded.

"It was an accident."

He nodded again.

I sighed and told him what happened, and it almost felt like I was confessing to something. I felt guilt as I explained to him, but after that… like a weight had been lifted. He gave me a hug and we walked out hand in hand, the oddest couple you've seen; dirty and disheveled holding bloody and bruised.

It was fun.

**James's POV**

I messed up. After they pulled Kendall off of me, I realized what had happened. Plain and simple, I messed up.

I hurt her heart in the club.

I hurt her body in the parking lot.

I hurt her cousin on the ground.

But most of all, I hurt my chances with her.

I'll admit, at first, I kissed Lacie back. But I stopped! Shouldn't that count for something? All I tried to do was fix things, but it was like I just killed her best friend or something; she wanted nothing to do with me.

I tried to explain myself to Kendall, but he didn't want to hear it. Just like her. He made the same face. Disappointed. Disgusted. Distrusting. Distant. And for the time being, there was nothing I could do about it.

Once upon a time, I heard that life wasn't fair.

I never knew that it was mean, too.


	13. Oh Shit Story of My Life

**Kendall's POV**

Eventually I let James talk to me. He told me everything. Chances are, I wouldn't have believed him if he hadn't matched up his knee to the dent in my car door.

We sat there in the parking lot, talking as if we hadn't just tried to beat the pudding out of each other. Carlos was sitting on the hood of Logan's car, zoning out in a way that only he knew how.

Logan came out holding Piper's hand. Seeing the jealousy flashing in James's eyes, I jogged over to meet them, whispering to Logan, who immediately relinquished her. I put my arm around her waist protectively, making a little more space between the two of them. James seemed to calm down.

He stood up from where he'd been sitting and opened his mouth. Piper bit her lip and stepped behind me as he started to come towards her. I ushered her into my car as I gave James a look that said it all; Back off.

He shook his head and started to walk away.

**Piper's POV**

Kendall had basically shoved me into his car and shut the door, leaning against it for a minute as if to emphasize the fact that I shouldn't fight.

He walked over to where James, Carlos, and Logan were. They talked for a minute or so before Kendall got in, the others going to what I assumed was Logan's car. Oh fun. Now I get to go back to Kendall's for the night without him.

**Kendall's POV**

I gave Piper a once over as I stuffed her in the car. I couldn't take her home like this, or Mom would send her right back from where she came from. Oh, the things we do for love…

I leaned against her door, hoping she played along and stayed where I put her. I told the guys my plan, which they all agreed to (James, a little too eagerly).

I hopped back in the car, noticing the disappointed look Piper was trying to hide. I thought my plan would make up at least a little for her sucky birthday.

"Hey Piper."

"Yeah?" she groaned.

"I was wondering… Maybe you'd want to sleep at the mansion tonight?"

Her head snapped up and she nodded enthusiastically… Just like James, a little too enthusiastically.

I told her how I couldn't take her home looking like that, and how I'd stop somewhere to get her some clothes. Against my better judgment, I called Victoria's Secret and pulled some strings. For the first time in a **long** time, they were open at 2 a.m.


	14. Lord Have Mercy

**Piper's POV**

Dear God,

Thank you for my wonderful, kind, sweet, fantastic cousin Kendall…..'s credit card.

Love,

Piper

PS: I guess the boy's okay, too.

I don't know **how** many times I've wished for this.

Here's how things went down:

Kendall called someone while I zoned out, not figuring he'd be talking about something I'd care about. He hung up, pulling into the Victoria's Secret parking lot. I looked at the clock , which read 2 a.m. That's when Kendall said:

"Go inside, and don't come out until you can't carry anymore."

When I asked him how I was supposed to pay for it, he smiled and said:

"Text me when you're ready to pay, but until then, me and my MasterCard will be waiting right here."

And that is why Kendall Schmidt is my hero.

After we paid (well, he paid), we got back in the car where I continued to pile on the cover-up. I slid some new clothes on under my old ones, not taking them off until I was completely dressed of course.

And viola! Kendall glanced over at me because I was humming. He did a double take and made exactly the same face as he made when I came downstairs earlier.

That's how I knew…

I looked hot.

**Carlos's POV**

When we got home, we all changed and piled up on the couch. It was still hard to believe that yes, our couch was big, but our TV? Bigger.

While I channel surfed, James and Logan talked about whether or not Piper staying here tonight was going to be awkward.

Kendall walked in with… Victoria's Secret bags? Was this supposed to be some kind of joke?

There wasn't anything funny about Piper walking in, bags in both hands, swinging them in time with her hips.

Surprise, surprise. We all said the same thing as we looked her up and down:

"Lord have mercy…"


	15. Senor Suave

**James's POV**

Woah.

Piper wouldn't look me in the eye. Not that it mattered, because I was too busy looking at her b-… erm, not her eyes.

I watched as Kendall led her upstairs to dump her bags in one of the guest rooms. There was a little bit of arguing, but they came back down no more than 15 minutes later, both smiling like nothing had happened.

I was staring at Piper's not-eyes again, not too happy to see that Carlos and Logan were too. I could tell tonight was going to be… interesting.

I cleared my throat, starting to get just a little too heated about the way they looked at her. She was sitting on Kendall's lap since the only open room on the couch was next to me.

Carlitos and Logie snapped their heads towards me, both red in the cheeks. I glared at them, hoping they'd give me the one thing I wanted most; a minute alone with Piper.

Seemingly getting the message, Carlos cleared his throat.

"I'm…um…hungry?"

I nodded.

"Yeah! Hungry… Logan. You should um… come make sure I don't get lost."

Logan hastily nodded and the two of them got up and left, looking over their shoulders every few steps as I mentally face-palmed.

Not wanting to be left alone with me and Piper, Kendall dumped her onto the couch next to him, running after the other two.

"Piper… All I need is for you to listen to me for a minute."

She looked down at her watch, holding up a finger that told me to wait.

"Your minute starts… now."

**About five minutes, two confessions, 9 million explanations, and a make out session later…**

"You're pretty lucky I'm bad at telling time" Piper giggled.

"I'm pretty…" I trailed off.

"What? You're pretty what?" she frowned.

"Nope. Nothing else. I'm just pretty." Piper giggled again.

"Can we come in yet?" Carlos screeched. "I wasn't even hungry**!**"

Wow, Carlos. Glad to be informed of such a critical development. I was scared you died of starvation or something.

"Yeah!" Piper yelled at the same time as me, making her giggle even louder.

"We're coming back on one condition. When I walk in, Piper isn't sitting on top of you!" Kendall yelled.

"Oh crap."

Piper untangled herself from me and crawled across the couch as fast as she could. When the guys came back in, she was hanging off the other side of the couch panting. Very smooth. Almost as smooth as what Kendall was trying to pull off.


	16. Why Me?

**Kendall's POV**

This is exactly why I don't like Piper with James.

She's too innocent.

When we walked back in, she was throwing herself to the opposite side of the couch, miscalculating just the tiniest bit and nearly flipping off of it. She giggled her girly little giggle between pants induced by the army crawl she had done to attempt (key word here: attempt) to go unseen.

I sat in a loveseat to the right of the couch, Carlos and Logan sitting between James and Piper. We were all quietly watching TV when I suddenly felt like someone was watching me.

I turned my attention to the couch, where Piper was sitting cross-legged with her hands folded in her lap. She'd apparently been pouting at me for a while, because her face lit up when she realized I was looking.

I sighed, weighing my options. I knew two things as of this moment; 1.)What it was she wanted and 2.)that I'd never win. That's exactly why I nodded yes.

Piper shot up and ran over to James. He grinned and held out his arms. She settled into his lap happily and laid her head on his shoulder.

Again. The things we do for love…

**Logan's POV**

I love Kendall. I love when he's happy. I hate when he's not. But honestly? It's not that big a deal when his unhappiness makes two people happy. Knowing I helped those two people be happy makes me happy.

That's part of why I said what I said next.

"Hey, guys. I know it's like 3 already, but anyone want to go swimming?"

The other part of why I said that? Guilt.

My singing plan had resulted in making Piper exceedingly unhappy, so it was only fair to make it up to her, even if in the smallest of ways.

I knew I had done it when Piper and James raced upstairs and Carlos had replied and got up like a socially acceptable human being…

Also because Kendall sat completely still, stone faced.

"Really Logan?"

"I'm sorry, dude, but it's not asking for much. Just give them this. It'll only be for an hour or two. And besides, it's not like she's gonna live here or anything… It's just one night."

"Not like I can stop them now."

He sighed dejectedly, knowing I was right. I almost could've sworn he'd said under his breath…

"Dammit! I just had to insist on her buying a bathing suit..."

It'll all work out, Kendall. You'll see...


	17. Teeny Weeny Yellow Polka Dot Bikini

**James's POV**

"Can I ask you a question?"

I knew she could hear me talking through the door.

"Sure! Go 'head."

"Why do girls take so long to do everything?"

Insert high-pitched gasp here.

"Just go without me, then!" she giggled. "I'm down to two bathing suits right now."

"Oh my god, you didn't even pick one out yet?" I screamed, banging my head on the door in frustration.

"Hurry up before I change my mind and make you wait," she sighed.

"Fine…" I muttered.

I went downstairs, figuring it'd be Christmas before I saw Piper again.

I went out the back door to the pool.

Carlos and Logan were on opposite ends of the pool, laughing hysterically as they pegged each other with a NERF football. Kendall was laying sullenly on one of the lounge chairs, staring up at the sky.

I went and sat down next to him, trying to make him talk to me. I couldn't get anything more than one word answers out of him.

After a few unsuccessful attempts at getting Kendall to magically remember how to speak, I heard the football hit the cement a few yards behind me. I didn't bother getting up, figuring one of them would get it. I had finally gotten Kendall to get into the pool with me when Carlos said "Hey Piper! Can you get the ball?"

All of a sudden, Carlos, Logan, and Kendall gasped. I turned around, confused.

There was Piper, in the hottest bikini I'd ever seen, less than a foot away from me. Once she knew she had my attention, she turned halfway around, bent over at the waist, and picked up the ball. When I stood up in the pool, my face was even with her hips.

Oh. So there_ is_ a god.


	18. Accusations As Loose As A Hooker

**Kendall's POV**

"Impossible."

The three of those idiots were staring at her butt. I barely noticed. Barely cared.

I was too hung up on the fact that she knew it. And liked it.

And the butterfly tattoo across her lower back.

I could barely form words as she stood back up. All of us were sputtering, trying to find something to say. But there was nothing to say.

**Piper's POV**

What were they looking at? All I did was say "Sure" and bend over to pick the ball up. Was there still a a tag on my bathing suit or something?

"P-Piperrr…" Kendall sputtered, lifting himself out of the pool.

"Um, yeah?" I replied, confused.

"P-Piperrr… Poolhouse…"

I obediently followed him, oblivious to the implications. By the time we got into the pool house, Kendall had figured out how to talk again.

"What the hell was that?" He sounded almost angry.

"What?"

"Waiting for everyone to look when you did the whole bending over thing! You know!"

"What are you talking about?" I was genuinely confused.

"You bent over all slow, and looked over your shoulder and what not! Go get dressed. I'm not letting you stay in the same house as James."

"Oh my god you think I was…. seducing him?" Nononono. Kendall was not going to play it like that.

Kendal started to get as confused as I had just been. "Um… Weren't you?"

"You idiot! My back's screwed up from getting thrown into a freaking car! I looked over my shoulder 'cause it got all quiet!"

"Listen. Calm down…"

"Are you freaking crazy? Don't tell me to calm down! If you accuse me of being some kind of hooker I'm gonna scream as loud as I want to! you're the one who grabbed this bathing suit and made me buy it!"

"Piper…"

"Screw you, Kendall. I'm leaving."

"Where could you possibly go at this time of night? You don't even have a way to get there! Be reasonable…" he sighed, running a hand through his hair.

I was already storming out, James on my heels.

He followed me into the house. "What just happened?"

"Kendall happened. Go get your keys."

"Um, okay, but it'd be nice if you told me why…" he whispered.

"You're taking me to his house. Now hurry up."

"But I thought you were mad at him? Why there?"

I turned around and looked him in the eyes, trying not to cry.

"I have no where else to go."

James looked lost in thought.

"I think I have a better idea..."


	19. Consequence's A Realization Not A Threat

**Kendall's POV**

I would've been right behind her if Carlos and Logan hadn't stopped me, insisting on an explanation. The worst part was, she and James had slipped out of sight.

I couldn't be sure if they went inside, but I figured Piper'd want to get her stuff before she left…

I figured wrong. It was all there, every single bag of it. Her bathing suit was on the bathroom floor, the clothes she changed into after the club vanished.

I ran to the window, looking out into the driveway. James's car was long gone.

I cried.

**James's POV**

"So, Piper. Was that a good enough plan for you?"

She smiled cutely, no longer upset.

"It was great. Now shut up before we get caught."

"How could we get caught?" I looked behind me. "Nope. No sign of Kendall or anyone else trailing us in their cars. The road looks pretty empty to me." I smiled at my own joke.

"You know it was really mean of you to let him think we drove off."

"Mean of me? I just saved your butt. Plus, you're doing it, too…"

As she was about to reply, we heard someone crying softly… More specifically, _Kendall _crying softly.

I slapped a hand over Piper's mouth before she could say anything. We waited in silence for a while before we heard him go back downstairs.

"God, I feel guilty" she whispered.

I slid out from under my bed, tiptoeing to the door. I opened it a crack to make sure no one was there.

"What do you need for tonight?"

"Just something to sleep in" she replied after some thought.

"Be right back."

I snuck into the guest room where Piper's stuff was, carefully digging through a few bags until I found something for her to wear. I carefully made my way back to my room, clothes in hand. I stuck them into my pillow before I crawled back under the bed with the girl I was dying to call my girlfriend.

We sat there talking for about an hour, with the two of us checking my watch frequently. As soon as the hour hand hit 4, I peeked out from under the bed. Once I knew the coast was clear, I whispered more to myself than to Piper:

"I'll be back in no time."


	20. Monsters Under The Bed

**Piper's POV**

I knew James was only going to get his car out of the neighbor's driveway.

_Don't worry, Piper. You're being stupid. Nothing's going to go wrong._

I kept on thinking that… until I found his keys lying next to me.

I couldn't just throw them out the window, or he'd never find them. Then we'd be in even deeper than we thought.

Just as I heard footsteps in the hall that couldn't possibly be James's, I started to panic. I knew James would be back any second to find his keys, and the footsteps were getting increasingly louder. I did all I could do;

I stumbled in the pitch darkness to shut and locked the window.

I ducked back under the bed , and heard the footsteps stop. They weren't even coming in here in the first place! I waited a few minutes before I rolled out from under the bed to make sure James could get back in.

That's when the lights flicked on, accompanied by a confused "What the hell?"

I dove back under the bed, sticking my hand out to wave Carlos over. He got down on his hands and knees.

I whispered "Don't talk, lock the door, and turn off the lights."

**Carlos's POV**

I did what she said, rolling under the bed as she commanded.

"What are you doing here, Piper?"

"I don't have any where else to go, but I can't deal with Kendall right now."

"Wait… So James is out there driving around in circles at four o'clock in the morning while you hide under the bed?"

"Not really…"

She explained to me about Kendall's parents' house being the only place she could go, which was one of the worst places to avoid him. James apparently decided to let her stay here, as long as she stayed hidden. She 'forgot' her clothes so she could sneak stuff out of the bags. Right now, James was trying to get his car out of the neighbor's driveway, but forgot his keys.

"If you want to leave Carlos, you can. I just wanted to explain myself so you wouldn't go running to Kendall… It'd mean a lot to me if you'd keep it quiet… A lot to **us**…"

I guess I didn't really have a choice. I sighed and started to roll out from under the bed. She whimpered a little as I started to leave.

"Have you ever been in here before, Piper?"

"No…"

"Yet you're lying under some random bed in the dark."

"Yeah…" She held on to my arm, obviously wanting me to stay.

I got back under, and even in the blackness, I could tell she smiled.

"You know you're my best friend, right?" she whispered.

"Yeah. Go figure."


	21. Why 'Ninja' Wasn't on James's Résumé

**James's POV**

I slipped down the trellis as quickly as I could. Hmm. I guess Romeo and Juliet did have it pretty bad.

I sprinted to my car, trying to stay behind assorted shrubbery. _Assorted freakin' shrubbery._ Kendall was afraid that I would screw up Piper…. If only he knew how much she had already changed me.

I jumped the neighbor's fence, reaching for my keys.

My keys…

_My keys._

Aw crap.

I bolted back to the house, oblivious to everything around me. Piper made me promise every few minutes for the past hour that I'd be careful, that I wouldn't get hurt. I felt almost guilty when I realized it.

I lied.

**Kendall's POV**

I couldn't decide if I felt more disappointed in myself or James.

I was gonna kick his ass when he got home.

I was slumped against the front door for what seemed like forever. I couldn't imagine Piper letting James take her back to her mom. I knew for a fact that she didn't go to my parents'; my mom would have called me to overreact by now.

As I sat there wondering where in the world she could've gone at 4 am, I saw it.

It wasn't uncommon for fans to track us down, running into our yard to see if we were there, but it **was** uncommon for those fans to be guys.

Guys jumping the fence from our neighbor's yard.

Guys jumping the fence from our neighbor's yard with a lot of hair.

Guys jumping the fence from our neighbor's yard with a lot of hair, who just so happened to be wearing James's lucky shirt.

Guys jumping the fence from our neighbor's yard with a lot of hair, who just so happened to be wearing James's lucky shirt and were about to get pounded by me.


	22. Face To Sexy Face Combat

**James's POV**

Kendall's hands must be little.

I mean, they must have been, or he never could've had his fist basically shoved up my nose.

He had a big mouth, too.

He basically swallowed my fist whole as I slammed it down on his face.

He returned the favor.

I was trying to stay quiet, afraid that Piper would look out and see us fighting. I know she'd be too worried that someone would get hurt to stay under my bed and stay quiet. After a few near silent minutes of James-to-jaw combat, Kendall pinned me down on my stomach, yanking my arm behind my back. **Dammit.** For the second time in two hours, I was on the ground with my best friend on top of me.

"Where is she?" he whispered into my ear, almost menacing.

"Don't you think she would've asked _you_ to drive if she wanted you to know?" I gasped as he pulled my arm further.

"Don't fuck with me, Maslow. I know you didn't drive anywhere. Your car isn't in the driveway and we both know it."

"It broke down, man. It's in the shop! Just let me go."

"Whose house, James?"

"What do you think? Ours?" I said it as sarcastically as I could.

Kendall chuckled.

He whispered to himself.

"You don't know how bad I wish that was true."

He slowly got up, offering me a hand.

"We cool, Kendizzle?" I asked timidly.

"Yeah, man. Sorry…"

**A few steps closer to the door**

"You sure we're cool?"

"Already said yes, James."

"Just checking."

**Not even two seconds later**

"You sure?"

"**James.**"

"Sorry."

"Whatever," he muttered.

"Would you kill me if I ever brought Piper back to the house?" I stuttered.

"What the hell, dude. She left less than an hour ago. Don't talk about her."

I shook my head, wishing I wasn't so in love with this girl.

Kendall was gonna be **pissed.**


	23. I Never Knew Perfect Loved Me

**Carlos's POV**

_She's beautiful._

We were squished under James's bed, talking by the light of my phone.

Talking about me.

Talking about her.

Talking about us.

Not that way, no matter how much I wished it. We were talking about how insane things were. Her life was changed in less than a day.

She was changing my life, too.

She was curled up in my arms, her head on my chest.

Giggle.

"What?"

"Your heart's beating kinda fast, Carlos."

"Oh."

What else was I supposed to say?

We talked about everything. When we finished, we talked about it all again. It felt like I was talking to an angel; she never had a bad thing to say, she laughed at every one of my stupid jokes, hugged me tighter every time she thought I was brave or just wanted to make me smile.

I checked the time on my phone when she brought up James.

Oh god.

It was 7:30, and we were still alone.


	24. Actors Date Bad Liars, Too

**James's POV**

I sat outside on the doorstep next to Kendall for almost three and a half hours, watching the sun rise and just talking.

I was dying to get back to Piper. I could only imagine how worried she was.

**Piper's POV**

For what seemed like the first time in my life, I wasn't worried at all.

Carlos made the real world go away, his arms making me feel all safe and warm as he pulled me further into them.

The worst part was remembering that he was the only one who made me feel that way.

We talked for what seemed like forever, but at the same time, no time at all.

He made me laugh.

He made me cry.

He made me excited.

He made me proud.

He made me wish that he wasn't just my best friend.

Everything he said made me love him more.

**Like a brother.**

Mhmm.

That's what the butterflies meant.

It meant that he meant nothing to me.

Hey… No one ever accused me of being a good liar.


	25. Winning 'Worst Friend Of The Year'

**Piper's POV**

James.

It's not like I really even knew him.

_Who are you kidding, Piper?_

Not myself.

I was confused out of my mind. Were we… together? Not even together but… Oh geez, I didn't even know what we _weren't_.

Ha. Says the girl cuddling with his best friend.

I buried myself deeper in Carlos's arms. They did exactly what I wanted them to do: made me forget.

I slid my hand closer to his, biting my lip. I knew I was going to have to find out how I felt one way or another, and I might as well get it over with.

**Carlos's POV**

The only noise was the sound of us breathing, slow and even. I figured she had fallen asleep. Was it creepy of me to be watching her, then? I heard her breath speed up a bit.

Either she was awake, or she had never been asleep in the first place.

I saw her bite her lip in the darkness. Her hand crept closer to mine on her stomach. I caught my breath as it slid into mine, warm and soft, searching for some kind of reaction.

James was my best friend…

But I squeezed it.

She audibly sighed. Relieved, I suppose.

We sat there, both of our hearts pounding in time, both of our minds wandering and wondering.

I wished she would. And she did.

Her other hand groped in the pitch black for the back of my head. It flinched back as she made contact with my hair, before pushing forward.

I couldn't let this happen.

I wouldn't.

I did.

My lips found hers. Correction. My lips loved hers.

It went so fast.

One hand was on her bare stomach, tucked under her shirt.

The other was in the back pocket of her jeans.

One of her hands was on my cheek, the other in _my_ pocket.

Every time I started to feel guilty, her tongue against my teeth made me wonder why this hadn't happened before.

Her legs wound between mine, and I went to roll on top of her.

**Thwap!**

Too bad the bottom of James's bed decided to make friends with the back of my head.


	26. Silence Is Golden and Overused

**Piper's POV**

Now I see why Carlos _Garcia _wears a helmet.

I guess he forgot where we were just as easily as I had.

I unwrapped my legs from their current position around his waist, letting him carefully flop back down on the floor next to me.

We sat in awkward silence for a while.

"So…" he mumbled.

"So…" I mumbled right back.

The little piece of angel in the back of my mind was screaming "What the fudge was that? Never do that again!"

I shut it up as I reached for his hand again.

Suck it, angel. I liked him just a little too much to give up because the voices in my head told me to.

We sat there hand in hand, not daring to speak and ruin the moment. Good thing, too, because the door opened and the lights flickered on.

**James's POV**

I locked the door behind me, walking over to my bed.

"Piper," I whispered, "You can come out now."

I heard the gentle brush of fabric on carpet, just before her head popped up on the other side of my bed.

"What happened to your face?" she nearly screamed. I put a finger to her lips as she worriedly crawled over to examine the damage.

I explained to her about getting caught and everything that happened after it.

She had tears in the corners of her eyes.

"Oh god, Piper. Don't feel guilty."

She sniffled. We sat in silence for almost a minute before she cleared her throat.

"Um, James?"

"Glad to see you remember my name."

She rolled her eyes as she continued.

"How bad would it be if someone knew I was still here?"

"Oh, I don't know. Why don't we ask Carlos?"

Piper stiffened, Carlos audibly doing the same under the bed.

"W-w-what are you t-talking about-t?"

"I can smell the chlorine and Axe. Hearing him breathe wasn't helping anyone, either."

"Come on out, dude. The jig's up."


	27. The Best Part of Pies Is the Fillering

**Logan's POV**

….

**Piper's POV**

James made me tell him what exactly happened while he was gone…

Needless to say, the story was edited.

As the two guys sat there talking, I stared at my hands, distracted by the taste of Carlos still on the tip of my tongue.

The taste I wanted more of.

**Carlos's POV**

One thing James has never been bad at is reading people. Normally he'd be on top of me, making me swear over and over again that I'd keep my mouth shut.

Tonight, that wasn't the case.

"You're not going to say anything. I can tell."

I shook my head obediently.

"Thank you."

Oh god, James. You wouldn't be thankful if you knew what we did. What _I _did.

I made Piper do it! It wasn't her fault…

It was never Piper's fault.


	28. WHY ARE ALL THE HOT ONES GAY? Oh, Carlos

**James's POV**

Carlos was wearing lip-gloss.

The same color as Piper's.

He was dead.

I didn't say anything, flipping it around in my mind. Eventually, he got up to leave.

He hugged her goodnight.

I waited patiently for him to close my door. That's when it started to hurt.

"Piper. You know how _hard_ that was? Sneaking around for you, lying to my best friend for you, getting _beat up_ for you?"

"Of course I do! Thank you so much, James" she whispered guiltily.

She crawled over to hug me, and my hand shot out and landed on her chest, holding her back.

She froze, bit her lip, and sat back.

I took the clothes out of my pillow and threw them into her lap.

"Go sleep with Carlos, not that you haven't probably done it before" I scoffed, trying to muster the angriest face that I could. I'd rather her think I was mad than see how hurt I was.

"James… I didn't… We didn-" I cut her off.

"**Don't** tell me nothing happened. All three of us know something did. Go. Get out. Sorry for keeping you from your beloved douche bag" I spat. I couldn't tell if the venom was real or fake.

"I'm sorry…" she mumbled, as her head went down. She got up and walked away, staring at her feet.

Did I care? No way.

Yes.


	29. Guilt Trips: Less Lonely With A Friend

**Piper's POV**

Oh god, I'm a monster.

James was fuming, not that I blamed him.

I didn't know what was going to happen next. All I knew was that I needed a hug, and I needed one bad.

I crept down the hallway, peeking into Carlos's room. He was fast asleep in his clothes. I'd feel terrible waking him up. After all, he could've been sleeping for the past few hours if I hadn't made him stay under the bed. I'm sure his head would hurt in the morning, so sleep might do him some good.

Kendall didn't even know I was here, so he was out.

The only one left was Logan.

He left his door wide open, so I tiptoed into his room, sitting on the floor next to his bed, his face a few inches away.

"Logan" I whispered.

"Logan! Logan, wake up," I whispered again.

Shaking him slightly, I continued with a "C'mon Logan. Wake up!"

_Sigh._

It obviously wasn't going to work. I figured I'd have to try something else.

I blew in his ear.

He giggled a little in his sleep, so I tried it again. Same reaction. Eventually I got his eyes to open. Barely.

"Mmm?" he mumbled, trying to make his eyes focus on me. I assumed that was the best I was going to get out of him.

**Logan's POV**

"Um… Well… **Ugh** god I'll just say it. Can I stay in here?"

I let her in because I was 1.) cold and 2.) too tired to remember the opposite of yes.

I rolled over, lifting the sheets on the other side of the bed. She made a little victory noise as she shut the door and climbed in. She fit her body to mine, snuggling into it. I threw my arm across her, happy that I wasn't like dying of hypothermia.

That's whe- ZZZZZZzzzzzZZZZZZzzzzzZZZZZ…


	30. I Know Who You Did Last Summer

**Logan's POV**

Ughh. What time is it? Why can't I move?

I blinked my eyes open, letting them adjust to the light. The clock on my table read 11:02.

Now for the whole immobility thing.

I looked down trying to figure out what was on top of me.

Oh god.

Piper was basically on top of me, stomach to stomach, her arms under the pillows on either side of me. The sheets were on the floor, my hands around her waist, halfway under her shirt.

Crap.

I suddenly remembered her coming in last night. Why did it never occur to me that she wasn't supposed to be here? Hadn't James dropped her off somewhere?

Apparently not.

I moved one hand up to her head, stroking her hair, hoping she would stay asleep while I figured out what to do with her.

_Don't be like that, Logan. You know you're loving it._

I had to agree with myself. Okay. That sounded weird.

I tried to figure out how to slip out from underneath her without waking her up. Fail.

Her eyes fluttered open.

"Logan?" she yawned.

"G'morning," I whispered. "What happened last night? Why are you back?"

She sleepily explained to me.

"You okay?" I sighed.

"Mhmm. I could use a hug, though," she muttered, half awake.

We slowly sat up and hugged, her legs caught up in mine. I held her head on my shoulder, my other arm wrapped around her back. We sat there, trying to figure out in our own minds what the five of us in this house did to deserve this.

**Kendall's POV**

I woke up, slowly remembering the events of last night.

God I screwed up.

I went to wake everyone else up. As much as I wished we could, we couldn't sleep through lunch. We had to go to the studio later, so we couldn't be late.

I went into Carlos's room. He snored obnoxiously as I shook him, hoping he'd get up.

He did, but not willingly.

I went to get James up. Every time I poked him, he would grunt at me and fall back asleep.

"James. Get up now or you'll never see your hairspray again."

And get up, he did.

Last stop Logan, as always.

I opened his door. Weird… It's usually open already…

"What. The. **Hell?**"

Chapter 30! I just had to make it a good one =) COMMENT AND SUBSCRIBE, CHILDREN OF THE NIGHT! BWAHAHA! Love to my Stubbthoye, and everyone out there who laughed out loud at least once when reading this book.


	31. I'm Sure You'll Still Be Hot WO A Nose

**Piper's POV**

I'm so confused.

I like James. I _like like_ James.

Just the way I like Carlos.

But Logan? Oh god…

When I came in here last night, I was only looking for a friend.

But now? I don't know…

Let me set things straight.

I am far from easy.

I'm just... confused.

**Logan's POV**

The door opened slowly…

I didn't even think of letting her go until Kendall started screaming.

James standing there watching our purely friendly hug wasn't helping either.

I saw his eyes flash as he lunged across the bed at me, fist first.

That's when Piper decided to squish herself between us.

**Carlos's POV**

I heard the squeal right before the screaming started.

I dropped the remote on the couch and darted up the stairs.

The shouts continued from Logan's room, so I followed them.

I skidded to a stop in front of the door.

James was lying on Logan's bed, hands over his face.

Logan was on top of him, punching and smacking him.

They were cursing each other out.

Piper was on the floor screaming.

Kendall was kneeling next to her, trying to pry her hands off of her face.

Four of the loudest people I knew were screaming at the top of their lungs.

Good thing I was used to it.

"**Everybody shut up!**"


	32. OMG YOU HUGGED HER? That's Rape

**James's POV**

No.

Nuh-uh.

Not happening.

Logan was not holding _my_ girlfriend, especially not in his bed.

They both looked up at Kendall and me, eyes wide and mouths open.

Ha. Kendall knows she's here. That's what she gets for doing who knows what with two of my best friends.

_Stop it, James. You didn't mean that._

I didn't. But it gave me an excuse to let myself love her again. We were as close to even as it was gonna get.

But me and Logan? Definitely not even. Not yet, at least.

That's why I lunged at him.

I shot myself over the bed to hit him. The satisfying crack of my fist to his nose was louder than I expected. Probably because of the shriek that accompanied it, plus the sound of him falling off the bed and smacking his head on the floor.

Geez. Logan was such a girl.

Oh god. That _was_ a girl.

**Logan's POV**

I couldn't believe he just hit her. I rolled over on top of James and started hitting him, figuring Kendall would deal with Piper.

He didn't fight back. He protected his face, screaming that he didn't mean it and that he couldn't believe I'd betray him twice in a row.

I screamed back at him, not only for hitting Piper but for accusing me of whatever it is he was accusing me of that I'm **almost positive** I didn't do.

Piper was screaming on the floor, only making it that much more satisfying every time my fist came in contact with James.

After barely a minute of it, Carlos ran in.

"Everybody shut up!"

The roar of the screams died down, the only noise Piper's crying and the two of us on the bed panting. When Carlos broke out the sergeant voice, we knew it was serious.

"James. Logan. Up," he roared.

We jumped off my bed, standing against the wall. Damn, he was intimidating.

He knelt down next to Piper.

"Move your hands," he whispered gently.

Unsurprisingly, she listened.

"Looks broken. Kendall. Get her an icepack and take her to a doctor." He was still whispering, looking almost sad.

Kendall sat there staring at him.

"**Now, Schmidt!**" There we go. Back to 'listen or I'll kill you' Carlos. Not that he was like that often, but we knew better than to doubt him.

Sometimes I wonder why I just had to be such a good friend…


	33. What A Card

**Kendall's POV**

"Owwwwwww! Ow! Damn it, Kendall!"

Having enough experience with broken noses, I told Piper we had two options;

1.)Take her to the ER, wait a few hours to be seen, and **hope** they can still reset it without re-breaking it

or

2.)let me reset it right now.

Obviously, she chose the second one.

... And she chose to do it without painkillers.

"Told you the Advil was a good idea," I muttered more to myself than her.

"Be nice. I'm broken, remember?" She pinched the bridge of her nose and tilted her head back. I handed her an icepack out of the freezer which she gratefully accepted.

"Listen, Piper… I'm… I'm really sorry."

"It's fine! I asked you to, remember?" She said it in a "duhhhh" tone.

"Not that…" I whispered.

"Oh." She pursed her lips, still staring at the ceiling. "I'm over it."

"Good to know." I hopped on the counter where I had made her sit so I wouldn't have to bend down to reach her nose. "We need to talk, though."

"About?" she sighed.

"You and Logan. You and James, too."

**James's POV**

Carlos was mad. Understatement of the year. Carlos was _furious._

Furious at me for hitting Piper.

Furious at Logan for hitting me.

After he finished screaming at us, we all went downstairs to check on Piper.

Piper and Kendall were sitting on the counter.

"We need to talk, though." Kendall's voice was muffled behind the wall.

"About?" Piper said nasally.

"You and Logan. You and James."

The three of us stopped on the other side of the wall, ears pressed to it curiously.

"I wonder why he didn't say Carlos," I remarked bitterly.

"What?" Logan scream-whispered.

I filled him in quickly while Carlos rolled his eyes.

We all started to listen again.

"…I don't know what you want me to say, Kendall. It's complicated."

"Not too complicated to tell me. Now go. Start talking," he ordered.

"I don't know… I don't think they do either," Piper said.

"Piper… You act like you're James's girlfriend or something one second, and next thing I know you're in Logan's bed! You make ridiculously googly eyes at Carlos almost constantly and to be honest… it's incredibly confusing. Just friggin' **pick one** already!"

"**I like them all, okay?**" Piper shouted, leaving Kendall speechless.

It sounded like she was storming out.

Oh crap. She was storming out.

The three of us ducked into the living room, throwing ourselves on the couch and turning on the TV. Piper plopped down on the couch next to me, a bloody towel pressed to her nose. Kendall came in a minute later, sitting on one of the loveseats.

All five of us sat there thinking about what she just said.

None of us liked it.


	34. How Does Fran Drescher Pull It Off?

**Piper's POV**

"You okay, Pipe?"

"Yeah, James. I have a feeling I'll survive."

He grabbed my hand and squeezed it.

"Mhm, James. That would only be annoying if you had, oh, I don't know... just broken my nose or something? Good thing _that _never happened."

He snatched his hand back. That's better.

God. I hate how nasal my voice got.

If James wasn't so cute, I'd just might have to kill him.

**Logan's POV**

When twelve o'clock rolled around, I can't say I was disappointed.

There had been almost an hour of awkward silence.

"Time to start getting ready, guys."

"Where are you guys going?" Piper wondered out loud.

"We have to film in an hour," I explained.

"Oh…"

"Um… Hang tight for a sec, okay?" I said.

I reluctantly left her alone with Carlos and James. Kendall had already gone upstairs.

I grabbed the phone, convincing the producer and the set manager to let Piper come with us. I wasn't leaving her alone with a broken nose and no way to call us. Our phones were confiscated before we started filming each day and given back the second we left.

When I went back in, Carlos and James were on either side of Piper, fighting for her attention. She looked relieved as I walked towards her, giving her an excuse to stand up.

"You want to come with us?" I asked, trying to keep my smiling to a minimum.

Her face lit up.

"Are you sure I'm allowed?" she asked as if it was too good to be true.

"I already checked with the people there, so unless Carlos, Kendall, or James are planning on stopping you…" I trailed off.

Much to Carlitos's and James's dismay, she hugged me. Ha. Looks like she has a favorite after all.


	35. Oh Dear God

**James's POV**

We took Carlos's Escalade to the studio. Before we came, we drew straws to see who would sit next to Piper, who ended up in the front seat.

Carlos was all smug and excited about it…

When the car stopped, I jumped out and opened Piper's door, letting her use my hand to get out. I didn't let go.

Carlos was extra careful to step on my foot for that one.

I swung her hand as we walked towards the building. We checked in, her hand still in mine.

_That's right, suckers. Be jealous._

**Piper's POV**

_So confused._

I was slumped against the wall, outside the door to the hair and makeup department.

Sometimes I wish Kendall was normal...

To tell the truth, I needed a break. That's exactly why I got up and went to the car, bored as hell. I flopped down in the backseat (Carlos had told me to hold his keys) and fell asleep.

Oh god… I couldn't even escape them in my dreams…

**Kendall's POV**

I went back out to tell Piper we were gonna start filming…

But she was gone.

Crap. I just lost my little sister.

The stage manager came out and told me they were starting. I told her I couldn't go yet; that I had to find my sister.

"I'm sure she can take care of herself," she muttered, annoyed. She was right.

_Dear God, if you do exist, please keep Piper out of trouble. PS: Keep me out of trouble when she gets in it anyways. _


	36. Moving On Requires Moving

**Carlos's POV**

Kendall told us during the break about Piper randomly going M.I.A. Great.

We hung around with the extras, making it a point to talk to anyone new.

_She was a brunette._

She was sitting in one of the corners basically alone, looking around like she was in a whole new world.

Her name was Kasey Fox.

We talked the whole break about how hard she'd worked just to be an extra on Big Time Rush. How hard she'd worked to meet her heroes.

_I was one of them._

For the first time in a long time, Piper wasn't the first thing on my mind...

Who was I kidding. I was nothing without the little girl with green eyes, no matter how much the blue ones I was facing intrigued me.

**Logan's POV**

Erin Sanders.

Pretty face. Pretty voice. Pretty good actress.

I didn't think I had even half a chance with Piper anymore. She made out with Carlos last night. She makes out with James almost every night. She woke up half-dressed in my bed this morning. Obviously, she didn't like me the way I liked her. But maybe, _just maybe_, Erin would.

She played my girlfriend on the show, so there must be _some_ chemistry there…

So I asked her out.

She said yes.

_But what about Piper?_

I tried to shut up the little piece of my brain that wanted to hope she'd let me love her and somehow manage to love me back. The biggest problem?

I couldn't figure out if it was my brain or my heart.

I had a sneaking suspicion that Erin would be eating at that restaurant alone Friday night, after all.

**James's POV**

She will be mine.

_Just keep telling yourself that, James. She loves every guy she meets… Every guy but you._

I don't know what I was expecting from her this morning. I mean after all, I'm the one who literally told her to climb into bed with someone else…

The breaking her nose thing wasn't helping my case either…

But no matter what, she _will_ be mine.


	37. She's an Eeny Meeny Miny Ho

**Kendall's POV**

I thought I knew her.

I thought I had Piper all figured out. I thought wrong.

The tattoo. The bellybutton ring I saw when Logan's hand was up her shirt this morning. The way she had every guy in our house wrapped around her finger and used them. She wasn't the girl she was when she first got here. She _definitely_ wasn't who she was 6 years ago when she left.

Yet somehow, James was still pacing and obsessing over her as if she was.

I dragged Logan and Carlos away from the girls they had been talking to and told them. Carlos decided he would be the one to go talk to him.

**Carlos's POV**

"James. We got to talk."

I pulled him into one of the dressing rooms.

"You have to let go of her, dude. She doesn't like you."

"Not yet! She did until I fucking punched her…" he muttered, shaking his head shamefully.

"Don't you get it? She probably thinks this is funny! She's setting you up like an _idiot_ and you're falling for it. She's just using you!" I shouted, shaking him for emphasis.

"She's not," he whispered.

"Yes she is! You know what, James? We probably would've freaking done it when we were under your bed if there would've been enough room!" Oh god. That was a bit much…

"Listen, James. I didn't mean-"

"**No.** You're right Carlos. She doesn't want me the way I want her. She's just some stupid whore I picked up at the club. A mistake."

"James, wait-"

He walked away shaking his head.

He marched up to the pay phone in the hallway and popped in fifty cents.

"Hello? Lacey? It's James…"


	38. Siblings Suck

**Kendall's POV**

_James is dead._

There was maybe five minutes left before we went home. He saw that slut who called herself Lacey walk up behind one of the camera men and signaled for him to come with her.

He just left in the middle of the scene.

We tried to stop him, but the director said to let him go; that we might as well go home anyways.

Therefore, _James is dead._

**Piper's POV**

"Pypropndator."

I groggily opened my eyes, confused as hell.

"Pypr! Opndator!"

I rolled down the window just enough to hear what Kendall was saying as he banged on it.

"Are you deaf or something? Piper! Just open the door, already!"

"God, you lazy ass. You had to wake me up for that? Open the damn door yourself." Siblings. Can't live with them, but can't live anywhere else.

"You have the keys, idiot."

Oh.

I unlocked the door and slid to the other side of the car. I threw the keys into the front seat for Carlos so he could start it. Kendall slid into the back with me, Logan basically throwing himself across the hood to get to the passenger's seat.

Carlos stepped on the gas.

"Wait… Where's James?" I wondered aloud.

Logan answered. "We're about to find out."


	39. Searching For Love Between His Sheets

**Piper's POV**

I am such a loser.

_He doesn't like you, Piper. He texted you. Called you a whore. Said he wished you'd go back to where you came from. Just forget him, already!_

Way to be, Piper. Sleeping in James's bed because it smelled like him; hoping he might come in and take it all back.

"Knock, knock."

Kendall poked his head in the door, not really expecting me to answer.

"You okay, kiddo?"

Yeah, Kendall. Fine and dandy. Don't mind the fact that the pillows are soaking with tears! It's just decoration… Mhm. All the rage in Thailand.

He sat on the edge of the bed, his hand running up and down my back.

"It's gonna be okay, Piper… I don't know why you're so obsessed with him anyways…"

"Am not." I whispered it, sounding like a little kid.

"She speaks! Do you want to come downstairs and hang with us?" he asked with concern practically dripping out of his voice.

I pulled the covers over my head. He patted it before he walked away.

I could've sworn I heard Kendall say as he walked down the hall,

"Why wait for someone who probably won't be back…"

**Carlos's POV**

Three hours after Kendall came out, I went in.

"Piper? It's Carlos…"

The crying stopped before she answered.

"Your room's down the hall."

I opened the door slowly, not quite expecting the lump under the covers squished into James's pillows.

"I'm sorry Piper…"

"For what? For calling me a whore? For telling me how much you hate me? For using me? Oh, wait! I'm sorry! That was James wasn't it? My mistake," she cried at me.

"I'm just sorry." I wasn't going to tell her that she was blaming the right person. I mean, wasn't I the one who started it? James was obsessed with her a few hours ago… until I got to him.

That's why I was going to make a plan.

Well, tell Logan to make a plan, but **I'd help!**


	40. Man Whore Is A Lifestyle

**Piper's POV**

For the next three days, I didn't come out.

The guys kept coming in to try and get me to eat, so eventually, I just locked the door.

I stared at the ceiling or cried for hours at a time, falling in and out of consciousness. I didn't have the energy to move, not knowing if it was the lack of sleep or the not eating that was shutting me down.

_James didn't want me, and I just couldn't handle that._

**James's POV**

I felt like a different person.

I was stuck at Lacie's apartment, only setting the Playstation aside to hookup, whether it was with Lacie or not .

I didn't want to stay anymore, but I couldn't go back.

I didn't want to face the one of two things that I'd find;

1.)Piper sitting in someone's lap attached to their lips, not even coming up for air to acknowledge I was back

**or**

2.)Piper crying like hell and doing something stupid like refusing to eat.

I knew I didn't mean what I texted her, but I couldn't be sure if she knew. I couldn't face her knowing what I'd been doing for the past three days.

That's why I went right back to what I was doing.

A pretty brunette who's name I forgot.


	41. You'd Think School Would Make You Smart

**Carlos's POV**

Things were getting ridiculous.

"Piper! I found the key. I'm coming in whether you like it or not," I shouted from my side of the door.

She didn't say anything.

I walked in, finding her asleep.

"Wake up. C'mon, Piper," I urged, shaking her.

She opened her eyes and stuck her tongue out at me before shutting them again.

I picked her up and threw her over my shoulder as I walked downstairs. She was too tired to put up much of a fight. After I crammed some Pop Tarts down her throat, she fell asleep on the couch.

When Kendall and Logan came in, they stood over her and gaped.

Logan was the first to remember how to talk.

"Dude. You're good."

I smirked triumphantly as I told them that I made her eat.

Kendall spoke. "Damnnnn. You're _really_ good."

"And you just figured that out?" Both of them took the time to slap me upside the head before they sat down.

**One week of normal Piper-ocity later**

**Kendall's POV**

He was there.

The producer of our show had given us almost two weeks to get things together. Two weeks to hope James showed up for filming.

I didn't actually think it would happen.

That's why I mentally face-palmed, not remembering why it seemed like such a good idea to test Piper like this.

**James's POV**

I walked in there like it was nothing, Lacey's hand locked around my waist. There was no way Piper was going to be there. If she was? I'd personally make sure she left.


	42. The End of the World as We Know It

**Piper's POV**

_Oh god, oh god, oh god, oh god…_

James waltzed into the studio, hot as ever, with his little prostitute friend latched onto his belt loops.

"Shh… Calm down Piper…" Logan whispered into my ear as I hugged him. I could only imagine the look he must be sending James's way at the moment over my shoulder. If looks could kill…

Taking the small part the casting director had offered me seemed like a lot better of an idea an hour ago.

**James's POV**

I knew that's how it'd be.

Logan and Piper were wrapped around each other already, him whispering god-knows-what into her ear. From now on, I was going to be in charge.

I walked towards them, Logan squeezing her tighter. I was less than two feet away when Kendall came over and dragged Piper away.

"'Sup, asshole," Logan was practically growling at me.

I could play that game, too. "Not much, bastard."

"Let me tell you something, James. I don't care what you do. I don't care where you go. I just care that whatever you do, you _stay away from her_," he shot venomously.

"I see. I guess I better tell you how this is going to go down, Logan. You're going to get one of the extras to take the little bitch home. By home, I mean back to the rat hole she came from. Then Lacey and I are going to **my** house. By my house, I mean the mansion I let you live in with me. Be a good little boy, Logan, and don't push it. It doesn't have to be **our** house for long. You'll be just fine if you play along, dipshit."

Logan got ready to hit me, but thought better of it when one of the set managers walked by.

"Get it straight, James. Piper's on the show today. For some reason or another, they haven't fired you yet. Straighten up or they will. I still love you, dude." Logan's face got softer as he said it. "That hooker isn't coming home with you. I don't care what you think. Either you, and _you alone_, are coming home, or we're going to work on making Big Time Rush a three piece deal."

I didn't feel like arguing. Honestly, he just told me to do all I wanted… but James Maslow doesn't lose. Ever.


	43. Call Me Whatever, As Long As You Call Me

**Piper's POV**

"Where is J-james?"

"Again." The director sounded almost angry as he instructed me to repeat the line.

"W-where i-is J-james?" My voice cracked as I whispered his name.

"Again. Louder."

"W-w-where is… W-w-where…" I could barely remember my line… Yep. All three words of it were fading slowly but surely.

"Again!"

"W-where…"

"**Again!**" the director screamed.

"Where i-is…"

"**Again, Piper!**"

I stood there staring at my feet, mumbling the line over and over again as the director screamed at me "**Again! Again, Piper!**" Kendall was standing behind him, biting his lip. James's gaze was boring holes into the top of my head.

"**Piper! Again!**"

"Where is J-james…"

"Again!"

"Whe-"

"Again!"

"**Where the fuck is James?**"

The director stared at me with… satisfaction?

"There's the volume… The passion, too," he smiled. "Take five, Piper, and we'll see if we can make it PG when you come back."

I walked towards the dressing rooms. I was about to walk up to Kendall… but then I saw the bird that James just flipped me. I pushed past my cousin, eyes locked on James.

_Maslow (adj.) – 1.) Russian (Maslov): patronymic from maslo 'butter', presumably applied as a metonymic occupational name for a dairyman or a seller of dairy products. 2.) __**Dead.**_

**Lacey's POV**

She's going down.

The little skank-wad Jamesy's been living with walked up to him, hips shaking. She said something unintelligible to him, resulting in a growling one-word response from him.

I marched over to them, my fists clenched.

I snaked my way between the two. The fail of a girl he calls 'Piper' gave me a once over and smirked. Nuh-uh. Baddddd move. My acrylic nails left a satisfying trail of broken skin across her cheeks and right eye as I gave the little whore what she deserved.

"Stay away from my Jamesy," I hissed. I gave her a quick shove for good measure before I locked my lips on James's. Lacie: 1. Everyone else: why bother keeping score?


	44. Not Bitter, Just Not Quite Sweet

**Piper's POV**

I grabbed the over-sized Barbie by her greasy mop of bleached blonde hair.

My fist sunk into her bony stomach, coaxing a startled groan from her lips as I shoved it in further. My knee went up to her face as she bent over gasping for air.

James stood there, dazed, a faint, unconscious smile on his lips. It wasn't until Lacey and I were on top of each other slamming each other's heads into the cement floor that he snapped out of it. Next thing I knew, his hands were around my waist, prying me off of the other, more injured girl.

He squished my back to his chest, leaving me thrashing around in mid-air. Carlos and Kendall were the next to be broken from the catfight's spell, running over to get Lacey off the floor and restrained. Logan rushed over when my fist came dangerously close to hitting James.

Both of James's favorite girls to sleep with were squirming in Big Time Rush's grips, spitting blood and assorted curses at each other.

I could feel every slash her fake nails had left on me, but knew they couldn't compare to the havoc I had wreaked on her face.

"**Listen up!**" The director was fuming. "Security! I want Blondie banned from the set. Boys. Piper. My office. Now."

**Carlos's POV**

Piper, along with the rest of the studio, froze as the director screamed at us, legs and arms sprawled awkwardly in midair. Not trusting her to stay away from Lacey, James passed her off to me, never letting her feet touch the ground.

Knowing Piper just as well as he did, I realized how good of an idea that was.

Piper grumpily mumbled through her swollen lips that she knew how to walk. Ignoring her complaints, I swung her around. Giving her a piggy back ride was a lot easier than pulling her off a girl twice her size.

I set her down just outside of the office door, shackling her wrists with my hands. We knocked and entered, praying to just about every god we could think of in hopes that one of them would have mercy and let the earth swallow us whole. Anything was better than the wrath of a po'd director.


	45. Speaking Your Mind Should Be Less Awk

**Logan's POV**

We all sat like guilty school kids, a straight row of chairs filled with slouching, heads-down, bruised singers… and Piper.

The director shook his head, laying it in his hands.

"This is getting ridiculous. All of you," he muttered angrily.

Kendall cleared his throat nervously. I shuffled my feet as Carlos coughed and James scratched his head. Piper was dabbing at her lip with her sleeve.

"James." As the director called his name, his head snapped up.

"That girl's no good for you."

"I know…" James agreed over enthusiastically for the sake of sucking up.

"I'm not talking to you as a boss. I'm talking to you as someone who cares. You aren't going to see that girl anymore, understand?"

James knew he screwed up. He nodded simply, knowing he'd been beat.

"Piper."

She continued staring off into space, hands roaming her swollen face. We all cleared our throats.

"Wha- Um… I.. Huh?"

The director continued as if she had answered right away.

"Shape up, girlie. Let's be straight. You and James. Not happening. Get over it."

Her jaw dropped, moving up and down as if she was trying to find something to say. James pulled at his collar nervously, sinking down further in his seat.

"What? You thought it wasn't obvious?" The director continued on. "Kendall. I know you're trying your best to keep things under control..."

Kendall started to smile, thinking he was the only one to escape criticism.

"But you suck at it." The director seemed oblivious to the defeat on the lead singer's face. "Stop smothering the girl and go get yourself a life. You need to start living for you, not for the rest of the world."

_Deeeep_. Can we get some snapplause?

"Logan."

Oh god. I didn't want to hear it, whatever it was.

"Tie your shoes, boy. We don't want to lose you."

Oh.

"Last but not least…" the director sighed, casting his gaze to a nervous Carlos.

"You're in charge of her now."

"**What?**" Carlos and Piper gaped simultaneously.

"You heard me. Piper, you need to be watched. Get over it. Your lack of common sense and over-all attraction to trouble don't help the whole cliché 'sexual tension' theme you all have running through the house. That's exactly why I'm telling Carlos to babysit you. End of conversation."

The director nodded more to himself than to us with satisfaction before getting up and leaving the office. With all five of us frozen in the most basic form of shock, he poked his head back in.

"Back on set in 5. Take your time." He walked off, humming 'Half Way There' with a smile.


	46. Irony

**Piper's POV**

"Piper, would you just sit down already?" Carlos sighed up from his position on the ground, my obsessive pacing obviously not as entertaining to him as it was to me.

I slid my back down the wall, my butt landing with a plop next to him.

I mumbled an apology. The two of us watched in awkward silence as James fell over repeatedly for the scene he had been filming onto a particularly cushy looking mat.

The director screamed about how the lights were all wrong, the sound crew was breathing too loud, blah blah freaking blah. "**Again!**" He nearly gave himself an aneurism, what with the intensity he threw into his command that doomed us to another half hour of James flipping himself over retardedly.

With a sigh, I let my head fall sideways into Carlos's lap, not caring about or acknowledging the fact that James was giving us the hairy eyeball.

**Carlos's POV**

"Oh, screw this" Piper mumbled, pushing herself to a standing position before attempting to walk off. With a quick sweep of my arm against the back of her legs, she was back on the ground, my arms locked around her.

"What the helllllllll?" She drew the last word out as she brushed the hair out of her eyes.

"The director said you couldn't go anywhere without me, and I can't leave for another hour so-" Piper cut me off, insisting that she'd be fine to take a cab home. After all, most of the extras had been sent home, with only five minutes of filming left before me and the guys had to head into the recording studio.

We half-heartedly argued, only stopping when the five minutes were over. I scooped her up and nearly ran to the studio so she wouldn't have a chance to fight.

:::::::::::

"Oh my god," I chuckled. "Piper, did you just growl?"

I couldn't quite place the look on Piper's face at the moment. It looked like Disdain and Fury hugged and turned into a facial expression.

I followed Piper's gaze… and saw Lacey licking her lips and eyeing James. Of course, James was completely oblivious, curiously staring at Piper's scowl, thinking it was meant for him.

Every step James took towards us led Lacey that much closer.

That's when Piper started shaking uncontrollably… and **turned into a werewolf!**

Nah, just kidding. But Piper **was** shaking, and a steady growl reverberated through her lips. To tell the truth, Piper was a lot more like a Chihuahua; growling, small, and incredibly predictable. I wrapped my hands around her waist just as she tried to pounce on the tall, boney blonde behind James.

Lacey snickered and snuck up behind him, shoving her hands into his back pockets and making a show out of feeling him up. Piper started kicking her feet uncontrollably, since they were the only things not restrained against me. Needless to say, I was a decent bit bigger than her, so her only weapons didn't even touch the ground.

Surprisingly, James snapped at the hooker wannabe and jerked away from her. He continued over to us, whispering something unintelligible in Piper's ear as she continued to growl at the shocked Barbie.

Don't you just love Mondays?


	47. Want Some Ice For That Burn?

**Piper's POV**

"_Supply closet. Lose Mr. Touchy-Feely._"

I kid you not. James was actually talking to me. And that's the first thing he's said to me for the past few weeks.

I felt a twinge of anger when he insulted Carlos, but hell, I wouldn't have known the difference if he said "I'm Hitler reincarnated. Now go kiss a walrus, Barney." All that mattered was that he was the one saying it. But then again, I had nothing against Taylor Lautner giving me a thorough lesson in Gibberish… His tongue might just have to help mine out, if you know what I mean, wink wink.

Something about watching him do the robot in the middle of the club on my birthday kind of killed that fantasy…

"Um… Carlos? I um… gotta go do something." I sounded ridiculous even to myself.

Deciding to play along, Carlos replied with a skeptical "And whatever might that be, Piper?"

"I…um… am gonna… um… go make sure the sinks in the bathroom are turned off. **Yeah.** I'll go do that. You know how eco-friendly I am… Um… Go green! Hugs not drugs!"Oh god… And once again, my beastly lying skills have proven themselves.

"Piper… Come on. What's so important?"

"I'm thirsty?"

"There's water right there…" Carlos pointed with a shrug to the nine trillion (Hey. No one ever accused me of being good at counting) water bottles on the table not two feet away from us.

"Um… Um…" Brilliance! "God dammit Carlos. Do I have to spell out 'I need a tampon' for you?"

"Oh." His eyes went wide, just as quickly as his cheeks turned as red as Lacey's hooker-chic lipstick. "Oh. Well… um. I- **Oh.**" He looked down, continuing to turn amusing shades of crimson. "I guess I could just wait here while you um… Why yes, Kendall! I'll be right there!" He darted towards my cousin who hadn't even registered that his name had been screamed not two seconds earlier. Nice cover, Carlos.

Not wanting to risk a sudden mind change from Señor Smooth, I darted for the darkened closet that I'd seen James slip into over Carlos's shoulder just moments before.

**James's POV**

"_James?_" she whispered. "_James, are you there?_"

"No," I joked.

Oh, Piper. "_Fuck. Sorry, wrong closet._" She started to open the door, but stopped after the first few centimeters of light crept in.

"_Wait a second…_" she mumbled. Ha. You thought she was kidding.

I pulled the string attached to the lonely, nearly burnt out bulb basically duct taped to the crumbling yellowed ceiling. Her eyes widened, her lips quivering with some unidentifiable emotion.

Without wasting a second, I scooped her up in a hug. She wrapped her legs around my waist, quietly crying into my shoulder. I whispered various words of comfort into her hair, hoping she didn't notice that I needed them more than she did.

After a few minutes of this, her breathing evened. With her face buried into my neck and her legs still clamped around my waist, I confessed.

Everything.


	48. Why Must All Fillers Lead to Fights?

**Piper's POV**

"Say it again," I whispered. "I don't believe you."

James sighed. "Don't make me," he pleaded. "I already said it."

"James…"

"Fine. I missed you, okay? All I wanted was to come back."

I knew I would never have gotten away with it if he hadn't told me about what he'd done.

Oh, yes. I know all of you out there are just dying of envy, what with my having my boyfriend who wasn't my boyfriend tell me in gory detail the last few months of his hooker-dom. Please, you with the brown hair! Try to contain yourself…

It stung. Every word brought a whole new set of wracking sobs into the front of James's shirt.

Wracking sobs that were apparently loud enough to start a riot.


	49. The Roof, The Roof, The Roof Is On Fire

**Carlos's POV**

I can't believe I fell for it.

When I heard crying in the supply closet, I kind of figured that it wasn't the Post-Its trying to comfort the unopened box of pens.

I went to open the door to find it locked tight.

"James. Get your ass out here so I can kick it!"

I thought I heard him say something to the effect of "Shove off. We're having a moment", but the abnormally thick door was muffling the sound.

Did James not enjoy having a face or something? Because based on what I've done to it in the past, I'm starting to question his logic…

**Piper's POV**

"J-James… We should go back out. I promise I won't let him h-hit you," I hiccuped into the front of his shirt.

After sitting in the closet for almost 20 minutes, the two of us had finally gotten our eyes dried and our differences settled.

"I don't care about that," he whispered, "because I may not know much right now, but I _do_ know that it's going to be okay from now on. Everything's going to be okay."

And both of us went right on thinking that…

Until somebody yelled fire.

**Kendall's POV**

I didn't know what Carlos thought he was doing, but I did know he had to cut it out and start running.

He was fumbling with the door to the supply closet in the corner, slamming his body against it between curses.

I ran over and grabbed him by the back of the neck. "Dude. We need to go, like _now_."

He ignored me, continuing to throw himself at the hulking piece of metal.

It never occurred to me why until I heard the screams on the other side of the door.

Two of the people I loved most were behind it, and the worst part?

There was nothing I could do about it.


	50. Breaking Doors & Burning Bridges

**Piper's POV**

I unlocked the door, twisting the knob. "No…" I whispered. "No. **No. Nonononono.**" I clawed furiously at the doorknob, both hands yanking on it as one foot against the wall added to the force of my backward motion. I started sweating, my hands slipping on the cold metal. Pushing against the crumbling plaster spread onto the solid wooden beams with my feet, I gave another desperate shove. My hands flew off the knob, the force of my legs propelling me into James, who was standing behind me.

"Piper," he whispered. "This isn't funny. Open the door."

"It's stuck!" I screeched, the tears in my eyes burning just as bad as the recording studio was.

He immediately charged towards it, using a foot to brace himself against the wall just as I had. "It's just a little stuck," he mumbled. "That's it. I'll get it. It's just a little stuck."

While I was glad James was so self-assured, I proceeded to bang on the wall and scream for dear life.

**Carlos's POV**

_BAM_

_BAM_

_pant_

_BAM_

_BAM_

_pant_

She was screaming my name, pounding against the wall on the other side of the door.

I was going to get her out of there if it was the last thing I did.

Oh yeah. Um, I was going to get James out, too.

I winced every time my shoulder made contact with the door. Kendall joined me after a few more desperate attempts to break it down.

We paused for a minute to catch our breaths, the smoggy grey smoke clouding our eyes and lungs. The room swayed around me in its orange glow. The sinister sizzles and crackles that boomed behind us were just background noise to what I heard Piper say next.

"Carlos. Kendall," she coughed. "Just leave. I don't want you getting hurt."

We stood there dumbfounded. Logan and the recording crew were outside calling 911 as we spoke, but saying there was even a one in one hundred chance the fire trucks would get here in time was pushing it. With no other words spoken, we continued to plow into the door with an intensity stronger than life itself.

The thick metal door started to give…

Right before the explosions started.


	51. Three Points of View Is Code for Intense

**Kendall's POV**

The explosions.

The noise alone brought me to my knees.

The blackness.

Whether it was because death had finally caught up to me or the smoke was just that blinding, the room looked non-existent.

The smell.

The room reeked of burning hair, death's stench lurking somewhere near by… and the sound of James's voice informed me that behind the dented door was that exact near by.

**James's POV**

"Wha- What's that noise?" I screamed over the rumbling hiss mounting from behind the walls. "Oh. Shit."

In what happened to be Stephen King-worthy slow motion, the rickshaw piping system on the wall opposite the door shook ferociously. The most menacing looking chunk of rust that seemed to qualify as a pipe ripped apart, flying towards me at the speed of a tornado. I said a quick prayer in my head, knowing I had no time to move. I squeezed my eyes shut, and felt the weight of the pipe go through me. I was dead. Dying, at least. I was finally done. Surprisingly, death was kind of... soft.

**Piper's POV**

The pipe was speeding towards him. **No.** James was mine, and mine alone. Nothing was taking him away from me after all that I had gone through to get him back.

I squinted my eyes, balled my fists, and stepped in front of him.

I felt the rusted metal break through my skin… and nothing happened? I stood there, James pressed against the door, his stomach to my back, staring at the wall. James screamed from behind me, his hands shooting to feel the pipe sticking out of my stomach. I looked up to meet his horrified gaze and opened my mouth to tell him I was okay, that everything was going to be fine. But instead of words of relief pouring out of my mouth? Blood.

The world went black, and the angels began to sing into my ear:

" _Take my hand, take my whole life too_

_For I can't help falling in love with you…_"


	52. Yet Another Filler

**Logan's POV**

_Hurry up. Hurry up. Hurry Up. Hurry up._

"They were following me a minute ago, I swear!"

"Don't worry," one of the executives whispered to me. "No one's questioning you. Just promise that you won't try to play hero. You dying isn't going to help anyone. Stay put, and I promise that help will be here soon."

"Do you think they're going to be okay?" I whispered.

"Um... I… Well- help will be here soon" wasn't quite the answer I was looking for.

Seconds later, the roar of sirens and screeching tires gave me some kind of hope that maybe, just _maybe_, someone would come out alive.

They brought out the hoses, spraying water as five firefighters rushed into the smoldering wreckage. As the officers questioned me, I stared intently at the door counting heads.

Out came what looked like Kendall, coughing on a firefighter's shoulder, hair and face blackened with ash. Carlos and James were literally being dragged out, both of them perfectly conscious. It looked like… they were trying to get back in?

I stood there, watching, waiting, praying for the last person to walk out… but was greeted with a limp form in the arms of a rescuer… A limp form with a hole in it.

**Kendall's POV**

"The helicopter will be here shortly, sir." They kept saying it over and over again. No one would answer my questions… tell me what was happening…. save my sister…

She was on a stretcher, held onto her side as to not drive the pipe through her any further. Her white tank top was now a sickening mix of red and brown, clinging to her ribs for dear life. James was smoothing back her disheveled hair, whispering to the broken doll of a girl. No matter how many times they told him she couldn't hear him, I kept catching him singing to her. Carlos and Logan were pacing, and assorted executives and staff were being thoroughly questioned as the police tried to determine the cause of the fire.

Maybe fifteen minutes later, the helicopter was landing on top of a near-by building. The medical team jogged with the stretcher, heading towards the door of the helicopter's impromptu landing pad.

They wouldn't let us go with her, saying there wasn't enough room for anyone who didn't have to be there. An officer scribbled down an address, leading the four of us who _hadn't_ been impaled with a stick coated in god knows what to my car.

I stepped on the gas before all the doors were even shut. My little sister was going to touchdown half an hour from here, and I was determined to be there whether or not her spirit was.


	53. Blame Game

**James's POV**

It's all my fault.

**Carlos's POV**

It's all my fault.

**Kendall's POV**

It's all my fault.

**Logan's POV**

It's all my fault.

But honestly, it didn't matter right now. All that mattered was the fact that right now, she was half-dead because of me. Her "boyfriend", her "BOYfriend", her brother, and her best friend were all crammed into a tiny waiting room, hating ourselves for even bringing her with us in the first place.

"Um… Piper Smith?"

"Smyth," we all automatically corrected the doctor.

We stared expectantly at the jumpy-looking young man in scrubs standing before us.

"Right…. Sorry. We've hacked off the ends of the pipe. It's too dangerous to try and get what's in her out right now. Blood loss, ya know? She's pretty much out cold right now, but she's…stable. You can see her if you want. Why didn't you menti-"

The four of us darted down the hallway in the middle of his sentence, stopping seconds later after realizing we had absolutely no clue where we were going. The nervous looking 20-something quickly strode, head down, towards a room a long ways down the hall.

He creaked open the door at the very end, peeking in with all four of us on our toes trying to see. Reluctantly, he let us in.

There she was, no sign of injury other than the slightest lump under the covers in the middle of her stomach…

Even thought the pipe was in her chest.


	54. World's Shortest Chapter

**Piper's POV**

"SHHH! Her eyes are opening. Shut up, shut UP!"

The room slowly crept into focus as I blinked away the haze of unconsciousness still lingering at the edges of my gaze.

The guys were crowded over me, looking cliché as ever.

"Piiiiperrrr?" Logan asked testily, drawing out the word as if unsure it was even me.

Through the tubes and bandages woven around and through my head, I peered down dizzily at the gaping hole in my chest.

"Pretty intense piercing, huh? I was thinking about getting my lip done next," I breathed.

The boys simultaneously lurched forward like they were planning on hugging me, stopping together a moment later after realizing there was no un-bandaged, un-bruised, or un-burned piece of me to hug.

They all talked at me (yes, AT me) with eager voices, not caring whether I heard, understood, or cared. After a good twenty minutes of that, Kendall stepped in.

"So." He stated the word with almost sorry conviction as his gaze trailed to the lump that felt the size of a galaxy sitting in the middle of my stomach.

"Let's get on to the next issue, shall we?"


	55. The End

**Seth's POV**

"No, no… Piper SMYTH," I repeated, trying to keep my cool. Our plane left in little over an hour. "S-M-Y-T-H. Smyth. I just need to know what room she's in."

Against his better judgment, the thin, terrified male nurse led me down the hall before rapping on the last door to the right.

"Come in," four masculine voices called from with in. Oh boy. I see Piper hasn't changed a bit.

**Piper's POV**

"Go on…" Kendall trailed, his voice hinting that he didn't want to know just as much as I didn't want to tell him.

"So… um… Next thing I knew… I was pregnant."

Kendall groaned his hand on his head.

Logan's eyes widened further, his hand casually rubbing the back of his head as his brows furrowed.

James and Carlos…. Well, I couldn't even look at James and Carlos.

After possibly the most dreadful , pregnant (no pun intended) silence I'd ever experienced, Kendall opened his mouth.

"So. Who's is it?" he whispered.

"Well… Um… The thing is… I honestly don't know." I could hear them each suck in their breath.

"Um… Any ideas even?" Logan questioned.

"I kinda sort of slept with half of you…" I mumbled, "but there's a chance it's –"

I was cut off with a sharp knock on the door.

"Come in," the four of them called.

In walked my worst nightmare, who happened to go by the name of Seth.

With a sigh, I spoke.

"But there's always a chance that it's his."

"Get some clothes on, Piper" Seth said. "Our plane leaves at noon."


End file.
